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The Astro-ZombiesRating:
Release Date: 14 August, 2002 Retail Price: $9.99 OUR Price: $9.99 You SAVE: $0.00! Cast: |
The Astro-Zombies Reviews
B-movie commits cardinal sin....
Unlike other truly horrible B-movies, like lets say Ed Wood's movies, this movie lacks the entertainment factor and becomes bogged down in numerous sub-plots and intricacies. Over all the movie is pretty boring.
Everybody is trying to get their hands on the "Astro-Man" who is sometimes referred to as an "Astro-Zombie." The Chinese spy, Satana, who never actually identifies herself as from that country, desperately wants to deliver the all-obeying "Astro-Man" to her government. The authorities and the mad scientist's former partner also are looking for the "Astro-Man" who was stupidly ressurected from a psychopath's brain and is now on a murderous rampage through town, killing off young gals.
The movie is flawed in almost every way. Many scenes are dragged on for much too long, especially in the labortories. The mad scientist talks to his wannabe Igor in B.S scientific lingo for a good chunk of the movie. If it made sense then it might have then made a valuable addition to the movie unfortunatelyu it does not and is as I earlier said B.S. The director decided to plop down numerous scens like this throughout the movie. Also it was never explained how the authorities came to the conclsion that a zombie was killing people. They tried to somehow make sense of it and they were not able to. Yes, I know this is a B-movie, it isn't supposed to make sense.
However the most egregious flaw in this movie is also what makes this a sub-par B-movie is that the zombies were only in the movie for about 5 minutes. The first zombie was exposed to us in the first 5 minutes then dissappeared for about half an hour. Instead the movie focused more on the ridiculous and boring sub-plot of spies and police officers which was neither funny nor scary nor anything that should be in a 'quality' B-movie. When we finally get some zombie action by the end on the movie we are already bored out of our minds and then dissapointed that that action oly lasts for less than 5 minutes.
The movie fails as a good movie but more importantly it fails as a B-movie as it is boring and overall not funny. I would recommend a little bit of use of the fast forward button if I were you.
an endearing guilty pleasure
I have a lot of affection for this film. I first learned about it from the Misfit's song Astrozombies and then I stumbled across Mark Of The Astrozombies (the sequel to this movie) on video. I was astounded! I then tracked down the original on DVD and it was love at first sight. I loved the great DVD cover featuring an Astrozombie attacking a beautiful female and those great cheesy blurbs like "See: Astro Space Laboratory"! Great stuff! I put this disc into my DVD player, hit play, and I had a blast! It's been magic ever since. Folks this infamous bad movie has become like a beloved retarded relative to me. Sure it's slow in spots (it would have played better if it were only a little more than an hour long so keep your finger on the fast-forward button) but it's got plenty of entertaining moments that I adore. Truly a gulity pleasure. The sequel is something else too. Wait 'til you see the living severed head of John Carradine in that one! Mark Of The Astrozombies is a fine follow-up and an even more enjoyable gulity pleasure. Ted V. Mikels has gotten better with age! THANKS TED!
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