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DolemiteRating:
Release Date: 19 March, 2002 Retail Price: $14.98 OUR Price: $14.98 You SAVE: $0.00! Cast: |
Dolemite Reviews
Only two reasons:
This movie is worth buying just for these two reasons:
1) The Hamburger Pimp (think of him as a crack-headed, nappy-haired version of Popeye's Wimpy). And he has his own theme music.
2) This movie contains the greatest single line in cinematic history.
Just as the two crooked cops (with their sideburns down to here) pull Dolemite over in a futile attempt to frame the baddest motha' around, they taunt, "You think you're so bad, Dolemite...riding around in your big fancy cars, wearing all them fancy clothes, with all of your black b*tches!" our hero snaps back with, "You forgot about the white one!"
They just don't make movies like they used two. Buy two copies, one to permanently leave in your DVD player. And the other to put under your pillow when you sleep.
-C
Cinematic Masterpiece!!
I recently had the pleasure of watching a film starring the Hunkiest specimen of Man-meat ever to grace the silver screen. It was Rudy Ray Moore in Dolemite. Let me start off by saying this is quite possibly the finest film ever made. Dolemite himself is a man so baaad that he doesn't even feel the need to be in good shape to impress us, he let's his martial arts do the talkin'. If Jackie Chan, Jet Li, and Tony Jaa were all combined into one glorious person they would still aspire to be Dolemite. To the untrained eye it would appear that Dolemite is not actually hitting people in the fight scenes. In reality he is just so fast that he can snap his hands and feet there and back so quickly that it gives the viewer the illusion that his foot is six inches away from the targets head.
This movie also has the flyest honeys ever captured on film. Queen Bee, the leader of Dolemite's kung fu strumpets, somehow manages to become more mesmerizing in each scene.
Dolemite's insults are so cutting that it would make Don Rickles weep uncontrollably. This is a man who knows in order to hurt someone's feelings you need to scream "muthaf***a" at the end of every insult. Also to showcase his wit there are five minute poetry reciting scenes. Some would say these scenes are waaay to long and very unnecessary, but that is just plum rediculous. It shows that he is a jack of all trades.
The emotion also runs rampant in this movie. I cried for hours after the tragic and untimely death of the "Hamburger Pimp". That's right the "Hamburger Pimp". Why hasn't Hollywood thought to name every character in every movie that. This movie is so gritty and real that they decided to make the boom mike visible in numerous scenes just to remind the audience that its just a movie.
All in all, if you see one movie in your entire life make it Dolemite.
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