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Armageddon Customer Reviews (40 - 42 of 90 Reviews)

A two hour music video... blech
Just what where they trying to do here? Is it a science fiction movie or an MTV music video? I haven't seen so much Hollywood claptrap put together in a single movie since... well I have to admit. Hollywood does put a lot of claptrap on a fair amount of movies each year. Either way Armageddon is one of those movies that tries way too hard to be cool, stylish and sexy all the while alienating any decent storytelling in the process.

Everything starts off well enough with the government going over the situation and some interesting side story at Stamper's oilrig. Even during the training scenes everything seems entertaining and even fun at times. The second the space shuttles launch you get an entirely different movie. It's an attention deficit disorderly's dream. You can pretty much time every single camera shot at about three seconds or less. Shots going back and forth between the spaceriggers and mission control and Liv looking soulfully into space and back again are dizzying and mind-boggling at times. It's like a music video gone mad. There is no room to just soak up the situation as director Michael Bay decides to just overwhelm you with bits of imagery instead.

I will admit the movie does look nice. Liv Tyler is cute and the lights and cameras are in all of the right place for some perfect poses. The problem is most of the movie seems to be about nothing more than all the lights and cameras being in all the right places for those perfect poses. The script slips up big time in a few places and there is more than one plot hole out there. Then there is the unbelievably stupid tragic ending, which I still cannot for the life of me figure out why they did it that way. It just didn't make sense for a family man to make the ultimate sacrifice (hope that didn't spoil too much... aw who cares...).

Still the acting is very good when you actually get a chance to see it (like before the shuttle launch/MTV music video movie starts). Billy Bob Thornton probably gets the biggest kudos for being the ultimate professional military man with a brain and a way of people to match. Michael Clarke Duncan probably stands out more for me as well because of a particularly entertaining scene regarding a psych evaluation.

I know Armageddon was a blockbuster and that people all over the world sings its praise. Well I don't! In my opinion this movie is nothing more than a cliché-ridden fluff that is to movies what pre-fab boy bands are to the legitimate music world. Crrrrrap! I can't recommend this short attention span nightmware and still be able to sleep at night.

I'd rather watch paint dry...
I find it truly amazing anyone could give this film anything more than 1 star (the lowest, unfortunately, Amazon allows). It really is a ZERO star flick. There is NOTHING about this film, in my opinion, that is good. Nothing!

Michael Bay's "technique" is so totally awful. Not just this, ALL of his films. The fact this guy is "allowed" to make films at all in Hollyweird just goes to show ya that "talent" and "creativity" have little to do with whether films get to the big screen or not. Michael Bay is a HORRIBLE "director." Simply horrible. I haven't seen (thank the Lord, whatever you may conceive him/her to be) all of his films), but if you catch "Pearl Harbor," another of his horrors, you'll notice that this guy is IN LUST with close ups, shaky camera, shaky camera close ups, fast TV commercial-like cuts and editing, and more and more and more and more of the same. Is all of this supposed to add up to enjoyable film entertainment? I think not, unless you're all crystal-methed up or something.

The story and characters are so cardboard cut-out, and all of it is so annoying, one hardly knows where to begin to diss this mess. But I won't even try. And do you know why?

It's because this is LOWEST COMMON DENOMINATOR filmmaking. And lots of folks will love this crap, not knowing any better (Forgive them Lord, for they know not...). The basic idea here could've been something special, but Michael Bay and whomever his Hollywood co-horts and associates are, turned this into ONE OF THE WORST BIG BUDGET HOLLYWOOD FILMS EVER!

Besides the crappy, by-the-numbers characters and plot, besides the "patriotic" nonsense (the rest of the world also threatened by Armageddon basically doesn't exist, or simply doesn't matter), virtually every shot, every scene, is so choppy, mostly extreme close ups (even when action scenes demand something else), and so cornball, that I wonder how anyone with half a brain could sit through this and actually find value in it. And "science?" Forgettabout it. This film's scientific value is non-existent. Even the special effects add up to zilch.

As I write this, I even find I'm wasting my time. Why waste time at all on pure filmic garbage? Hollywood and the "studios" have offered us a helluva lot of great films, despite obvious limitations and compromises. In my heart, I'd like to believe that in times of deep reflection and honesty, Michael Bay himself would even admit that this film is pure crap. But this is not a movie I have any "heart" for except for total contempt and the first time I saw it was enough. Further excerpts caught on replays on TV have only confirmed my original thoughts.

This movie makes "Independence Day," another pretty bad movie, look like a masterpiece. This is a 4 Tylenol special, and have on hand plenty of eye drops. Michael Bay should be banned from making any more films. There may be worse "filmmakers" out there, but none of them are making any money, and are probably working at your neighborhood 7-11.

A total mess...paint your wall and watch it dry. You'll enjoy yourself much more than watching this.

Bruce, Bruce, Bruce!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I saw this movie for one reason: to see Bruce in action. He was totally handsome in this movie. I can't beleive it only got two stars! I would give it a high four. Even without Bruce this movie is great. But i don't think i would have rented it if he wasn't in it.

Anyone seen "Hostage?"

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